Tag Archives: stupidity

Who Counts and Who Doesn’t

Here’s how we count people on the Upper East Side: The three of us reached the Park Avenue median at 76th Street just as the light was changing. The older gentleman approached slowly from the west, using a cane. The … Continue reading

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Stabbed By An Antique

On a crowded rush-hour IRT local, I said to this woman, “You’re going to hurt someone with that thing,” pointing to the six-inch hatpin with a sharp tip protruding at eye-level from her hat. “I’ve been told that several times … Continue reading

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Why I Don’t Have An iPhone, Reason #1

I still found that calls regularly broke up on some major streets. In New York City, riding in a taxi along the Hudson, one important call was dropped three times on the new iPhone. Finally, I borrowed a cheap Verizon … Continue reading

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For My Subaru-Driving Friends

A museum for the car’s most annoying feature.

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Organic Eggs, Inorganic Packaging

Does anyone know why organic eggs are increasingly packaged in these ridiculous plastic containers, that are not only unrecyclable petroleum-based products, not only wasteful (there are three pieces rather than the usual two, with a third inside cover over the … Continue reading

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Is Diane Keaton doing the menu for Au Bon Pain? (Shudder.)

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Too Much Chocolate

I’m in Hershey, PA, for a conference, and am astonished to find that there is a such thing as Too Much Chocolate. You smell it everywhere. The streetlights are shaped like Hershey’s Kisses. You get a chocolate bar when you … Continue reading

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Second day, second song

Today’s FAWM song is “Plastic Bags,” a song I’ve wanted to write for some time. There are plenty of examples of wasteful excess in American culture, but few more ludicrous than carrying a box of plastic trash bags home in … Continue reading

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Facebook Spam Redux

So just after writing a few friends who’d written me FunWall notes (which I won’t read, because to do so you have to install the application and I’ve been down that road already), I got a “challenge” from a friend … Continue reading

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